7 Aug 2016

Just Do It

I had this idea to write a post about my passion for doing thrilling and adrenaline filled experiences which suggests that it reflects my personality but it has suddenly dawned on me that I am not actually that kind of person. This post is a bit of a mixture of ideas sort of crammed into one. It makes sense in my head so I thought I'd give it a go anyways... try to stick with me here.

When someone asks me 'what is your proudest achievement in life so far?', I feel like I haven't got much to say. Am I that boring? Yes. I feel like I'm one of those people that can never be fully satisfied with themselves. However, thinking about it I have done some pretty cool things that I know not many people get the chance to do. Yet I feel like I haven't achieved anything that is really what I have wanted to do and what I think is successful.

Here is what I would like my ideal achievement list to look like:

1. Graduate university.
I should be graduating from my degree in the summer of 2017. For me it isn't a case of narrowly scraping a pass though, I want to be able to say that I achieved first class honours or upper second class honours. I want to be able to make my family and friends proud of me. I really think anyone can achieve this if they really stuck to it. I think I need to focus more in order to achieve my goal.

2. Travel for a few months.
This is a lot more difficult to do now. I know people say that it is possible to travel at any time during any point of your life but realistically it isn't true. I wish I would have found an opportunity that would've given me the chance to travel before I started university. I would have loved to live somewhere else for a few months. It would have been a great experience. I have travelled on holiday with family and friends but only for the duration of a few weeks, not months. So, I would really like to achieve this one day. Perhaps after I graduate I can organise something.

3. Get a job that I love and I am happy in.
Since I was 16 I have worked in retail. Some jobs were great and some were not but eventually I got bored of all of them. Retail isn't for me but as a student, it is the easiest way to earn money whilst at college or university. I am currently in a retail job that I absolutely hate but I can't bring myself to leave it because I need to be able to earn some money on my own. It is only a temporary fix until after I graduate, when I'd be able to work towards something that matters to me. Being happy with my career is basically what I am striving towards. I can't wait to get stuck into a full time job that is within the field of work that I want to be doing for many years and not get bored!

4. Surround myself with positive people.
Throughout my entire school, college and university experience, I have had quite a journey in terms of finding the right group of friends. It is a long story to tell, perhaps for another blog post, but having positive friends around me is important. Some people won't get it and some people will. At the end of the day it is what I want to be happy and currently I feel like I could put myself out there more and socialise to develop better relationships with nice people. I feel like the older you get, the harder it is to make friends. I don't know why it is so difficult. I feel like I am a loner. Although I like being alone, it is sometimes hard when you feel as if there is no one's shoulder to cry on - not literally but just someone to support you in whatever you do.

5. Move out into my own flat.
I would love to move out, by myself, into my own place. It's something that I know I am ready for but need more motivation to do so. I didn't move out for university and although it has a lot of benefits... it is also something I regret now. I wish I had the chance to develop and grow by living by myself. Moving out could've given me the chance to meet new people easily too. I am considering studying a Master's degree after graduating and will hopefully be able to move out then. For now, I am stuck living at home only wishing that I could.

You're probably thinking that I am being such a negative nelly and I totally agree with you. It is all my fault. I should have planned this all out better so I could achieve my dreams. I do have a plan for certain things so it isn't all negative! On a more positive note, I can list a few things that I have achieved so far in life...

1. I have done a 160ft bungee jump.
Not everyone has had the chance to do a bungee jump. It was definitely one of the best achievements.

2. I got into university with the grades I wanted.
I worked hard during my a levels to achieve the grades to get into university and work towards my goal of my dream job.

3. I own my dream car.
I have managed to purchase and run my own car (which is a bit pricey for a student but definitely an investment!)

4. I did a 13,000ft skydive.
This is by far the coolest thing I have done to date. I am addicted to adrenaline themed things now. Definitely isn't a representation of my personality though!

5. I am making an effort towards doing things that I enjoy.
I started a blog, which I post consistently on. I write for an online magazine, which helps to build my professional portfolio. I am getting into photography and should hopefully be taking a camera course soon. I volunteer in a field that I am aiming towards working in some day. I try to find new things to keep me busy everyday.

Judging by the big smile in the picture above, I am not actually that down in the dumps about my life. There are negatives and there are positives. I know I need to get out there more. I am grateful for what I have achieved so far, some people may not be able to experience some of the things I have. Everyone has down days and I know I shouldn't let it get to me.

Without this post sounding too much like a reflection on life and experiences post... I should have lived by the motto, just do it, and I wouldn't even be moaning right now. I am going to try and think of it as more of a lesson rather than a rant. I need to change my perspective and outlook on certain situations and things in life, and hopefully I will.

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